My crazy breasts

I think that I could write an entire book about how insane my boobs have been during this pregnancy.

During pregnancy my boobs grew...a lot. Like, I was a 34B before (and by the way completely content with that...I am not someone who wished I had bigger boobs, I didn't really care); during pregnancy a 36 C...that's giant to me, and I hated it. They just kept growing and it made me want to jump off a bridge, or so I thought.

Since I've given birth...I didn't even think it was possible...but they have gotten even bigger. The bra I am wearing right at this moment is a 38D. No, that's not a typo--a D. Are you kidding me? Let me tell you right now, this bra is a bit tight. TIGHT!?!??! That's bullshit. I want to cut them off and throw them off a bridge instead of jumping off of it myself. They are seriously all National Geographic floppy and I hate them.

Well, if the giant-ness of the boobs wasn't enough craziness, on Saturday I realized that I had...a breast INFECTION. Yeah, that's right...the pain doesn't stop with childbirth. This is one of the worst pains I have had in my entire life. First, it feels like you have the flu; fever, chills, achiness. Second, your breasts feel like they are on fire, like literally hot to the touch. Third, they hurt like hell. Like, if you touch them, at all, in any way, it hurts terribly. And, if you're breastfeeding, you touch them A LOT, as does your baby. Yeah, so it's been a rough few days. My boobs are feeling better, not great yet, but better. I had to call the on-call doctor at my OB-GYN to get an antibiotic and directions for how to deal with the crazy pain. THankfully, she called in a prescription for me, and it was a good thing she did because my fever spiked to 101 degrees on Saturday night.

The saga continues tomorrow when I have to go to the lactation consultant for a consultation on how I'm breastfeeding. I suck.

I hate my stupid boobs.