When I say "Yucky" to Finn he says "blech." It's probably one of the cutest things on the planet. Biased? Yes. We got him two new pairs of shoes over the weekend, and he screams bloody murder when we tried to put them on him. Like we were trying to kill him. He also cries when he puts his feet in the grass. What is that? He put the shoes on (finally) yesterday and only cried for a little while, but it was weird.
A student came up to me this morning and said, "I think that our critique should be due on Wednesday" to which I replied, "I appreciate your input."
It's a sad state that education is in at this point, truly sad. Yesterday I went to a meeting that talked about how grades shouldn't be punitive--you shouldn't give zeros for non-completion, you shouldn't take points off for being late, you should let students retake tests/redo papers until they master a skill. And then I wonder, "Why am I here?" "How could I run a newspaper staff or yearbook staff without being able to enforce deadlines?" It's just insane. Indiana is insane, education is insane, sometimes I think this entire country is insane. There's a new bill that just got introduced in Georgia that said if a woman's baby was stillborn--she would have to continue carrying it until she naturally went into labor...because cows and pigs do it all the time. What is happening here?
I am as close to depression as I have ever been. I don't really know why. Finn is coughing AGAIN, and I want to know why he is getting sick again. I want to know why I wake up angry almost every morning, and start (and end) the day sad or mad, or both.
Yesterday I got home from school at 5:15, to a HOT, MESSY house (after trying to entertain him at school for 2 hours)...and I do not do hot. I made dinner, while Finn (who has been REALLY clingy) cried and grabbed at my feet/legs. I tried to give him activities to do in the kitchen--which is what I normally do--but he just wanted to be held. And I couldn't do it. I never feel like I can do anything right, or what I decide is right. Randy didn't get home until 6:30, and all I could think was...I have to do this for four more days. Four more days. We took Finn outside and played, and then Randy put him to bed. I worked on things for my sister-in-law's shower, and went to sleep.
I don't know. I am just feeling lost, and tired, and I don't know how to pull myself out of this funk.
Writing sometimes helps, complaining sometimes helps, but I think what will really help is Spring Break, and time with friends, and seeing the Hunger Games this weekend...and spending time alone with Randy.
We will see.
I am sorry for your funk and I feel that saying "Hang in there, everything will be OK" is so f'ing cliche at this point. I just really hope that you can have a wonderful Spring Break that will help recharge your battery until the end of the year. It really is almost the end of the year! I'm hoping that Ten and I can get in on some Becky/Finn time over break and I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL SUNDAY FOR HUNGER GAMES!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteKate has been clingy/whiny at my feet, too. She doesn't want to be put down and nothing entertains her except being held. It must be a phase.
ReplyDeleteAlso, if I was a student now I'd be so lazy. so, so lazy. I was, anyway, but if there are no consequences, then what's the point? Granted, school isn't a substitution for parenting (though I think some parents don't realize this), but isn't school a place where kids learn life lessons as well as facts? Shouldn't they learn there are consequences and that when you're out of the safety net of school there are punishments for not doing work and not doing it right? We're going soft as a society.