Here's the kicker...

So...yesterday was a bad day. Randy was leaving for three days (yuck). Finn is still having issues because of his medicine (yuck). I hadn't slept well (YUCK). And I was running late (as usual).

So, I went to school. I taught two classes, I did so crabbily (it's a word...yes it is. Don't give me any sass.). After 2nd hour is the first time that I pump at school. It's the beginning of my plan, and it sucks...literally and figuratively. So I turn on my pump, and it doesn't work...at all, the stupid light doesn't even turn on. I start freaking out. Like seriously freaking out. My thought stream went something like this...

"ohmyeffinggod. whattheheckamisupposedtodo? I canNOT believe that this is happening, I have a meeting at 10, I can't even leave to go to the store."

I pick up and call Randy (mistake #1).

Me: My breast pump is completely dead.

Randy: Are the batteries dead?leave

Me: NO RANDY I DON'T CALL YOU when my batteries are dead. I am not an idiot.

Randy: Just go home and plug it in.

Me: I don't have time.

Randy: You don't have time to do anything. So it's a moot point. That's what I would do.

Me: I need to buy a new pump.

Randy: that's $200, that's stupid.

Me: I HATE YOU ()*)(*$)#*$)Q(*R_A)*WR)_EA*_A)*(R_)ES*$)#*$A How could you possibly not understand how my job works? I can't just leave? I am stuck here. Why are you so ever-loving dumb.

Randy: uhhhh...

Me: Click (that was me hanging up in case you didn't catch it.)

Still freaking out, crying, and getting more and more frustrated, I try again. Still doesn't work. But I have to go to this meeting, it's for a post-observation.

I go, I sit, I freak out.

I finish right at the end of my plan, so I have no time.

Study hall...at this point, my boobs hurt. I ALWAYS pump twice a day. ALWAYS.

I decide that I'll go to target during lunch (after 2-3 more phone calls/freak-outs with Randy because he doesn't understand me/why this is a problem/etc.). This means that I have to kick my over-achieving kids out of my room, because they always stay in my room during lunch, run to target, not eat, and get candy for the little beggers who (when I tell them why I am kicking them out of my room--to go to target) beg me to buy them candy. I seriously run through target, and if you've seen my fat-ass run lately, it is QUITE amusing. I buy the cheapest, most ridiculous looking breast pump ever, and candy (God FORBID I forget the candy), and RUN my butt back to school. I then get back into the school, and have to leave to go pump.

It takes me ten minutes (when I should be in class), to put the stupid thing together, my boobs STILL in pain, and I get it together, press the on button, the light goes on, I hear the weird suction-y sound (YES that's a word too. Shut it.), and I think YES, except it doesn't work. I can't FOR THE LIFE OF ME figure out how to get it to work.

I completely lose my shit. Like COMPLETELY lose it. Start crying, start freaking out, "what if my milk supply drops because of this?" "what if I leak all over the place while I'm teaching 6th hour" WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

After that 10-15 minute breakdown, I text Laura and beg her to hold finn off for one feeding.

I run out the door at 2:45, get to Laura's by 2:52, home by 3:00, feeding Finn by 3:01.

Afterwards, I try to plug in my pump, and here's the kicker.

It was set up wrong. The suction thing-y (I know, I know), was plugged into the power part. That was what was wrong the ENTIRE TIME.

The entire thing was a fabrication in my mind. I created all that drama in my head.

I went to bed thinking, "tomorrow has GOT to be better."

Before 7 am I had been peed on twice and pooped on once. Today was still better.