The Men in my life

I think that it's somewhat awesome that I am going to have a little boy in just a few days. One of the reasons that I think that this is so awesome is because I have been fortunate enough to be surrounded by amazing men in my life. Men who are thoughtful, sensitive, caring, giving and loving.

Those of you that know me, know that I would call myself a feminist. There are some negative connotations to this term. The men who are closest to me in my life know what this actually means to me, and I would call them feminists as well. These are people who respect me, respect who I am and that I can be anything that I want to be.

This is why I never think it is true when people say "It's a guy thing" or "he's just being a guy" because usually they are talking about a man, who is being either unkind, disrespectful, or uncaring. In my experience, men know how to do all of these things, and just as well as the women in my life.

The first person is my dad. I talk about my dad a lot, and that is because he is honestly my hero. I cannot count the amount of lessons my father has taught me throughout the years, but a few of them are: acceptance, love, showing love, forgiveness, patience, and loyalty. A few of the worst moments of my life were when my dad was upset/disappointed in me, and some of the best moments of my life are when my dad was helping me celebrate my achievements.

One of the greatest gifts that my dad taught me was that I am important, and I deserved to be treated well. I see so many students who are treated poorly by their boyfriends, and allow it to happen. They laugh along when boys/girls call them "sluts" "skanks" etc. In my opinion, this stems from the way that these girls were treated by their fathers. My father never once treated me like I didn't matter, like my opinion was unnecessary, or like I was anything other than one of the most special people in his life. It was also modeled in the relationship with my mother. My parents fought when I was young, without a doubt. However, my father was always respectful of my mother, even during their worst fights, he never chose one of his children's sides over his wife, and always backed her up. I didn't realize it at the time, but I now realize that marriage is the most important relationship in a person's life, even more important than a relationship between a mother/child or father/child. I respect that so much.

Another lesson that my dad taught me is to not care what other people think. There is not one moment of my life that I remember my dad EVER giving a damn what other people think. I remember my dad being silly, and crazy throughout my childhood, and never stopping. My dad has never stopped playing and being silly. Recently, Ava was telling him about 'the dancing game' a game that Randy, Ashley and I made up with her while we were driving around in the car. Well, Papa stopped the car, got out of the car (on Fran Lin Blvd, while several other cars drove by) and danced in front of the car, while all of us sat in the car, watched in disbelief, and almost peed our pants laughing so hard. He never thinks about "I'm too old" or "People are watching." He is my hero, and I hope to be half the parent that he was to me.

I was fortunate to be blessed with my father, and I continue to be blessed with my wonderful husband. Randy is so amazing in so many ways, and has taught me so many lessons in the 11 years that we have known each other. Sometimes, Randy and my dad are so much alike that I am seriously weirded-out by it. Randy has so many of the same characteristics, he is sensitive, accepting, giving and the most loving person that I have ever met. Randy taught me how to communicate--I mean really communicate. My family is good at a lot of things, but talking things out is not one of our strong suits. Randy taught me that talking it out is so important, and I can't believe how much I have grown throughout the years because of him.

Randy has so many amazing qualities--one of the things that makes me love him the most, is another thing that I think comes from my father--Randy takes care of me. He doesn't just take care of me, he takes care of our home, our dog, our future son, and me. I've never met someone who is so attentive to my needs (especially during this pregnancy), and he always wants to fix things--my feelings, my home, my life. He is constantly doing his best to make things better for others.

Randy also doesn't care what people think. He is constantly being silly, making me laugh, making Ava and Grant laugh and just being an awesome human being. I can think of so many times that Randy has just flat-out made me crack up. I'll tell you about 2-3 of them that are within the last few weeks. First, Randy and I (me at 9.5 months preggo) learned the soldier boy dance on Monday night. We hooked up the computer to the TV, and seriously watched tutorials teaching us how to do the dance...and Randy danced his heart out, and cracked me up. What other male do you know that would do that? Second, I called Randy on my way home from school last week and said "What are you doing?" Randy casually replied "Watching Princess Diaries" and then we both spent a few minutes cracking up about this. He doesn't care what he is "supposed" to watch--he watches Glee with me, all my girly movies, Sex and the City and Say Yes to the Dress. He may not love it, but he'll watch it with me. He is so perfect for me.

Last, one of my favorite things about Randy is the way that he interacts with children. It always has been. One of my favorite memories of when Randy and I first started dating was when he and Ashley would play "Betcha can't do this!" with a big red ball in my parent's basement. Ashley was probably 9 years old and always wanted to hang out with us, and we would let her. Ash would bounce on the ball and say to Randy "I betcha can't do this!" and they would go back and forth doing this for hours...it was hilarious. Throughout the years, I've seen him do the same type of things with Ava and Grant, playing with them, making them laugh, and being genuinely in the moment. How could I not be excited to see this man be a father.

This brings me to the next "little man" in my life. Finn. Maybe it's my lot in life to be surrounded by amazing men, I can't wait to meet this little one, but I know with his daddy being such a wonderful guy, and his Papa being so wonderful, he will have some great role models, and I can't wait to watch him become the person he will be. :)